Thoughts on “Problem Solving”

I’ve been thinking about “problem-solving” lately. Now, the “positive thinking” advocates out there will say, “Don’t think of them as ‘problems’,” and that’s fine. Sometimes it is best not to think of problems as “problems”, but as a fairly pragmatic person and a horseman who works with horses for the public, sometimes it’s useful for me to focus on a “problem” and treat it as such. But that’s not what I was thinking about, really, so let’s not spend too much time on that tangent.

What I was actually thinking about was how there are kind of two ways to approach a problem in an attempt at resolution (well, there are more, of course, but these were the two I personally was working through at the time). We can get to where we FEEL better about the problem, though the problem still exists, or we can seek to change or eradicate the problem, and thereby how it makes us feel. In the first method, I get to where I feel better while leaving the problem intact, and in the second method, I feel better because I’ve solved and eliminated the problem, and therefore I feel better.

Both of these methods work, if the goal is to make US feel better. Either way, whether I just acknowledge the problem and learn to live with it, or I change or eradicate the problem, I will feel better. I WILL feel better.

BUT, now introduce the horse. Let’s say the horse has a problem that makes me feel bad (scared, angry, frustrated, sad, whatever). Let’s say that the problem also makes HIM feel bad. Now, if I just get to where I feel better about my horse’s problem, I feel better but the horse still feels bad. Whereas, if I change or eradicate the problem, now there’s an opportunity for both me AND the horse to feel better.

For example, let’s say my horse is pushy on the ground. This is a “problem” because he bumps my head with his head, he knocks me off balance, and generally pushes and shoves me around on a daily basis. Maybe I find it irritating, and maybe I recognize how dangerous this could be in certain situations. So I decide to identify it as a “problem”. Using one method of “problem solving”, I could just get to where I feel better about my horse’s pushiness. I could make excuses for him, I could make excuses for me, I could exercise denial and avoidance, I could even go find other people with pushy horses who don’t fix it and we could support each other and our feelings about our pushy horses. One way or another, I could get so I FELT better about my pushy horse. But my horse would still be pushy. He would still be unsettled in a world not of his making, in which he had no idea where he should be or what he should be doing to find peace and harmony. He would be an unsettled herd and prey animal, whose herd and prey instincts were not being satisfied by his attempts to find his place in the environment he lived in. But I would feel better.

Or, I could practice the second method of problem solving by changing or eradicating the problem and I could get my pushy horse not to be pushy any more. I could give him consistent and fair boundaries and limits, presented in a way that a herd and prey animal would understand. I could “solve” my “horse’s” “pushy problem” so we could BOTH feel better. My horse could be more at ease around me, and I could be more at ease around him. We could both feel better about it.

Now, there are times in our lives, and in our horse work, where we’re going to use both of these methods. We might not even have a choice which one to use. All I’m saying is we might want to be aware of what we’re doing so we don’t leave the horse miserable if we can help it. Just because we feel better doesn’t automatically mean the horse does too.